Something new…

The content of this blog has much to do with why I’ve felt so discouraged lately. Through internet and texting communications, I’ve had several hard/difficult conversations that have led to a breakdown in deep and meaningful friendships. Ultimately, it also led to them leaving our fellowship. I look back and I wonder several things…

· I don’t feel like I’ve been given the benefit of the doubt. I’ve worked very hard at building relationships and loving others. This has been a strong part of my ministry and my personal life efforts. I definitely believe I should have a reputation for developing positive, loving relationships. Yet, in these interactions and the result of them, it is as though my reputation was just the opposite or at least that I had no reputation regarding such. I wonder, “Am I missing something?”

· For someone who values relationships and working through difficult things, I’ve not been able to save friendships that have gone awry. My influence in this has certainly been related to my exhortations to what I believe are Kingdom values and ways. Through my exhortations, have I pressed too hard? I know I’m not Paul from the scriptures, but as I read his writings to the individuals he led, he was definitely harder on the people he loved than I’ve been. Yet, maybe we live in a different culture. Maybe, I haven’t developed quite the reputation Paul had. (ok, no maybe there) One thing I realize is that Paul isn’t so concerned about losing friends as he is exhorting folks to live fully for Christ. Of course, his heart was broken when people chose not to, but his driving force was that he cared most about urging them to encompass Kingdom values and ways. Lately I’ve been reading Ephesians. Paul’s love for people and for them to know Christ fully is so blatantly evident. In our culture, how can I call people to Kingdom values and ways without driving a wedge in our friendships and/or partnership? Or can I?

· In one particular situation, I was attacked over and over by some folks who didn’t know me. My heart broke when those that did know me did not come to my defense. They left me out to dry. I had never felt so alone. I had never felt so betrayed. I suppose Jesus mentioned these things would happen. They happened to Him. He certainly experienced that much more than I did, obviously. Is this what makes me more like Christ? Then why don’t I feel more like Christ afterwards? Maybe my vision of what being like Christ has been scrubbed Disney clean and I forget all of the aspects of His life. While this may be a real aspect to Christ’s life (and therefore ours), it’s still difficult to accept in my own.

This relates to the current challenge in my journey with Christ. Recently, I believe Christ has brought something to my mind that has been having a dramatic effect on my life and ministry. There were specific times in my life in the past where I didn’t receive the support and defense that I needed. In the midst of some traumatic experiences, those around me were not able to provide the compassion, support and defense that I needed. I did my best to pick myself up by my bootstraps and go on. And on, I went. In fact, by the grace and mercy of God, I believe, I’ve been able to find much success in life. But, the need(s) (and hurt) never left me. In fact, the need(s) and hurt taught me a way to cope; an unhealthy way to cope which I believe has had a direct impact on my expectations of others and my response to their needs. Why do I share this?

Because I believe God has me on a new journey of forgiveness, renewal, and transformation. I’m not sure where it is going to take me or how long it will take, but I definitely believe God wants to do something new in my life. He wants to do something new in my heart. While I don’t believe this will happen overnight, I’m ready. I’m ready for something new.

Shawn

A new series on the “why” of house church

Why? What’s the point of house church? Why can’t you just go to church like everybody else?!
 
Those are good questions! That said, let’s take a look at an overview of reasons that one would do house church in the United States of America in 2010, more particularly Springfield, Ohio. (And feel free to comment below if you have different or more reasons, especially if you would like us to discuss them).
 
House churches are participatory, discussion oriented, relationship based, missionally driven, informal, include food & drinks, and oriented around spiritual/real life. Different people have different primary reasons for participating. For all of us, our values and current outside influences drive what we do. Some of those values are being real, deep relationships, leadership orientation, evangelism, family-oriented, shared life, holism (integrated real/spiritual life), and stewardship. I cannot overstate, the way all of us do things are a direct result of the values we hold (and of course, those pesky outside influences).
 
Can you think of other general characteristics of house church or personal values that might encourage someone’s participation? What are some that might inhibit their participation?

Oh, grow up!

When my children were born, I saw these precious babies that were so beautiful, yet so helpless. They couldn’t do anything on their own. Not that it mattered much to me at the time because I was overwhelmed with their being and blessed by the beauty of their innocence. If I had considered it, I surely would not have expected or wanted them to stay in such a state of immaturity and helplessness, but in those moments it didn’t matter much to me. I was just blessed. Even today, as I watch my kids grow up, I can’t help but be excited by the people they are becoming and the potential that continues to exist. My daughter, Morgan continues to surprise us with the difficulty of her school work as we help her. She is understanding things more as an adult today and less as a child. Her perspectives are changing from simple and concrete to complicated and abstract. Just last night, she understood a sarcastic adult comment as a joke that just a couple of years ago would totally not have gotten. (Think, adult humor in kids movies). Now that comment may bother you, but I see it as a natural progression of growth and am encouraged that she continues to learn and think and understand the world in new ways. It happens. It’s called life.

Some may want their children to stay the same age their whole life. My wife jokes about never wanting our girls to grow up. She enjoys their simplicity. She likes that they don’t understand all of the evils in the world. She doesn’t want them to get hurt in the ways that are inevitable when you become a teenager and eventually an adult. She likes that they like her. (Place your own teenager joke here). However, I am convinced that she doesn’t really want them to not grow up. (Right, honey? Right?) If that were so, she would never experience the joy and pride of seeing them graduate high school, become Nobel Prize winners, get married, have their own children, and ultimately experience the same joys she has in life. (Ok maybe, I went too far with the marriage/children thing). She wants them to become fully functioning, healthy adults that love other people and make the world a better place.

God wants the same. He loves you just as you are. You are a blessing today, even in your immaturity and/or struggles. He is amazed at you, his child. But, he wants better for you. He doesn’t want to see you 20 years into life needing your diaper changed and someone else feeding you. He doesn’t want to see you 30 years into life acting like a teenager. Why? Because he’s selfish? Of course, not. It’s because he knows what’s best for you. He sees so much potential. He wants to free you from your past. He wants you to experience new joys and new life experiences. He loves to see you mature and reach new heights.

Why do I mention this today? It seems we are consumed with growth, spiritual and not, when people are children and teenagers. But, somehow as adults we often see it as not very important. Growth is for someone else, not me. Growth costs too much. Growth means change. I just got comfortable. Growth seems like a great concept for children, but as adults we’ve got better things to focus on.

I don’t believe for a second God sees it this way. Growth is not optional. It is a part of life.

It’s your turn. What are your thoughts on growing? Spiritual or otherwise? How do people grow? What are ways we focus on learning? How can we remember to keep our own growth as a part of our lives? Or is that even necessary?

To Hold the Finger of God

Lately, I’ve been feeling disconnected from God. Today I went out on a walk during lunch because it was such a beautiful day and I couldn’t let that go to waste since the rest of my day was going to be spent inside. As I’m out on my walk I began to think about how disconnected I feel and why. Then I grab my phone and start to look at my facebook wall. Oops. I thought about reading my Bible, but didn’t really feel like it. Facebook opened and right as I began to read my wall, I felt prompted to exit the program. I did. I decided it’s time to try to connect with God again. I opened my Bible and picked up where I had left off, John 5.

Two thoughts were wondering through my mind as I walked. Eternal life is knowing God. This denotes relationship. The other thought was that of my counseling classes. The purpose of counseling is for the counselor to help a person overcome a place in life where they are stuck. This requires understanding. A counselor must first do his/her best to understand the client. This requires a genuine concern for the other person, communication skills, and the actual process of talking about the problem and getting to know the individual.

Knowing God. Understanding others. Knowing. Understanding.

A verse of scripture halfway through the chapter caught my attention. It is one I’ve heard before and understood from a perspective of ideal, but not too much, from one of experience. “The Son (Jesus) can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing, and in the same way.” Even Jesus only did what God was showing him to do. I imagine this requires a close personal connection to the Father. This requires knowing the Father. This requires understanding who God is and what He is doing. Knowing. Understanding.

As I read through the rest of the chapter, Jesus blasts the religious leaders because they don’t have life, they don’t believe Jesus was sent by God, and they don’t know God because they don’t have a clue as to what God is up to. (They think their rules are more important than healing people.) He reminds them how they should know God and Jesus as Messiah, but he makes it clear that they don’t. They would understand what he was about, if they knew Him.

Understanding. Knowing.

When parents raise their children with love, active involvement, the child’s best interest always in mind, selflessness and maturity, children grow in a safe environment where their needs are usually met. They mature with a real sense of trust in their parents because they’ve looked to them for support and they’ve received it. Their parents have demonstrated they can be trusted with their answers and guidance in life. This is not to say the parents have been perfect, but that they have been consistent and dependable. This environment and these relationships allow the child to grow and mature in ways that God intended and purposed. It doesn’t mean they never have problems or struggles, but that they can meet those challenges and overcome them.

When parents raise children and treat them as if they are a burden, look out for their own interests first, are not actively involved in their lives except when forced to be, continually put the kid’s needs aside because of their own desires, and act like children raising children, the child’s growth, maturity and general outlook on life will reflect such. They will often have severe emotional issues. They will struggle with learning to cope with even basic life problems. They may hoard food. They will often cry a lot. They will find whatever way they can to meet their need without regard to others. Additionally, they will most likely find it very difficult to ever develop a trusting relationship.

It’s sad, but true. I’ve seen the difference in kids. You can often see it in their actions and in their reactions. The differences in these two types of children and parents are great.

In these two scenarios I’ve described, the difference is the parents. In our biblical example, there is no difference. God is the same to both Jesus and those religious leaders. The difference is in understanding. The difference is in how they see their God. Do they see him as one who loves them and they can trust? Or do they seem him as one whose love is infinite and can always be trusted?

I imagined myself as a little child walking a path. When I see God as one who loves me completely and can always be trusted, I reach out my hand and HOLD THE FINGER OF GOD as we walk together along the path. I know He is the perfect Father. The last few weeks though, I’ve been a little five year old wandering a path by myself. Now mind you, I’m familiar with the path, but often become disoriented and distracted. Looking back, I know God has been there watching me, protecting me from harm, but I certainly wasn’t aware of it at the time.

When I reach out and HOLD THE FINGER OF GOD as a little child with complete faith and trust, I know I am walking in safe boundaries. I know God will lead me to better places. I am excited about the journey and not just the destination. All that I need will be provided. I have companionship that will never leave me.

I want to walk every day and HOLD THE FINGER OF GOD. Do you?

PS – As a parent, if you are struggling in your relationship with your son or daughter or they are wayward, my examples are not necessarily an indictment on your parenting. You may want to reflect and ask God what responsibility you hold, but in no way am I accusing parents for the wrongdoing of their children. I purposefully used the word “usually” because parenting is not a science. It is an art. And it involves the free will acting of more than one person. Besides, there is no perfect parent, except our heavenly Father.

Life House Community blog moving to this site…

This is a trial version of moving the Life House Community blog to a new site (wordpress.com). Let us know what you think!

In case you never saw the previous blog, you can find all our old blog posts here…

http://ourhouseisyourhouse.blogspot.com/